Hello I want tech supports

Ok, what's your username?
..username? what's that?
it's the name you use to login
..the contract number?
no, the username for the website
..can I give you the contract?
I can't help you without the username
..I don't know it
Have you ever registered on the website?
..maybe, I'm not sure
what's your email address? and I can do a search
*numerous attempts to decipher incomprehensible email address, can't find anything likely*
why don't I just give you the username?



kill me